I am always interested in new phrases and words that will pop up in our culture. Over the past few years the term “power couple” has become very popular. It describes a couple that appears to have arrived at some level of success in their particular craft and vocation. They dress sharp. They look good. They are well known within their circles and beyond. They are looked to as a standard for other couples. You see power couples mainly in entertainment, but they are also prominent in the political arena and now even within the church culture.
There are several definitions for the term power couple; however, I believe that the definition given in the Urban Dictionary is one worth noting:
“A relationship between two people who are equally as cool as each other. They are as individually awesome and fun to be around as they are when they are together.Neither one depends on the other for their feelings of self worth- they know in their heart that they are just as valuable to the world as the other. Good looking, optimistic, and sparks a light in the world that people recognize that goes beyond a normal relationship.In a power couple, if one person is flawed, the other person makes up for their weaknesses in strength. Together they are the epitome of what anyone would desire in a relationship. They encourage goodness in the world and make it a better place by being together.”
Note that power couples are described as positive, optimistic, and having an impact in the world that “goes beyond a normal couple.” I have to confess that for a while I had negative feelings about the term power couple and I could not understand why, because I can somewhat get with the definition given in the Urban Dictionary [other than being the “epitome of what anyone would desire…] and in other sources that defines the term.
I believe that the bad taste in my mouth for the term came as I watched people dub other couples as power couples but they knew very little about these other couples. They could only go by what image was out there of the “power couple.” I have seen people on Facebook hashtag the term power couple, and I am pretty sure that they know little if anything about this couple that would fit with the definition given above. However, they look like a power couple because they have a very public image and persona.
What disturbs me the most is how quickly we in the church embrace the nomenclature and colloquialisms of the world and make them our own. From the perspective of the Kingdom, when I think of a power couple, I do not think of image as much as I do impact.
For me, a power couple is a couple who is effective in collectively doing major damage to the kingdom of darkness through the subversive efforts of prayer, study, raising kingdom minded children, and discipling the next generation for optimal impact in the world. In my mind a true power couple works in harmony to undermine the current power structures of this world’s systems to bring about the global change that will reflect the values of God’s Kingdom.
I have the privilege of being in close relationship to such couples and what may surprise many is that they do not live out the public image that many have tagged them with. I can think of one friend that I recently had lunch with. He and his wife are considered a “power couple” and in my estimate they truly are, but not for the reasons many would think. They are people who are intentionally raising their kids in holiness; they are trying to navigate a church through the dynamics of a changing urban landscape; they are trying to impact a city one person at a time, and they are trying to love each other into the fullness of what God has designed for them. Yes, they may have a stylist to help them because they are in the public eye, but they are not at all fazed or defined by it. That is why I love them.
I know people who aspire to be a “power couple.” My heart breaks for them because it will never happen in that way: at least not in a way that will have any eternal significance. This is not something that you pursue. It is something that God entrusts you with for His glory.
My suggestion for those who want to be a power couple? I suggest Micah 6:8: “He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you But to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God.” It is in that place my friends, that Keniya and I collectively want to be.